Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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