i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
