I feel like I'm in dance class right now
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
i drank out of a bidet.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
