I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
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Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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