Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
