Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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