so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize
