When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
