And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
