theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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