she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
