is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
