You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
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