it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
