There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?