Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
