Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
areolas are like halos for boobs.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
