she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
The uberlube is also flammable
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize