haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
