I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Randomize
