FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
my being single is dangerous.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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