Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
