Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
