I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
