He had one of those small greek statue penises
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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