But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
You left your phone here
Wait...
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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