I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
