Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
it was like eating out sand paper
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize