john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
