Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
