I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
