And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
