at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Randomize
