I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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