You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
