this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
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