does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
