Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize