..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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