She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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