She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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