my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Randomize