And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
