oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
