Me too!
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize