What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
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