How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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