Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
