Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize