is your mom at the bar?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
