I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize